Settling in

So it seems as if I'm settling into my new role as a housewife. Though, sadly, I've come to realize that I still need to get up before 8am.

Though after reading another blog, I've come to an epiphany. I'm using this "new role" as a distraction to not accomplish what I should be accomplishing in order to pursue school and to get my benefit stuff in line. Though admittedly... the doctor and dentist appointments we've had this week have sufficiently interrupted my day. That, and my hasty focus on a different effort have been taking up quite a bit of time. And my husband is out of town. See how easy it is to self-justify??

I am excited at the prospect of school! MBA in Healtchare Administration. A field friendlier to the female sort. (nice consonance, no?) And I think I'd feel like I was somehow working for society, less so for THE MAN. Like I'm adding value people understand. Making some large corporation more efficient... who really cares? Heck, they didn't!

Have I ever mentioned that I turned down a job with the department of energy in Idaho Falls / Pocatello? Idaho Nucular Laboratory. As a process engineer. With nukes. Required a security clearance. Would have been cool. But it was so... "post WWII East Berlin" there. and the towns... just weren't as pretty as here. No green to speak of, unless you count sagebrush. An hour drive to work each day. Well, there's a bus that's hired out that everyone uses. Not to mention that there's no starbucks to walk to with a buddy, and the cafeteria was... reminded me of prison or something. There'd be no working from home (National Security can't be VPN'd in), no cell phones with cameras, desk materials circa 1962... so I declined it.

My cough started up right after my interview there... but let's not dwell on THAT.

Ah, well. Life is good, really. I feel much better. I've made a big decision regarding the company, and I'm feeling relief and peace again. Now I can focus on my boys. And getting the details straightened out.

And I've found some yoga on the dish. Recorded some. Now I need to actually do it!

So I'm having a hard time making myself go to bed. I'm tired and all... but my world is still off balance.

Purge Party
I cleaned out my entry closet and the shoe baskets we have on/under the entry table. There are still a couple items left to take care of, but that's one big item off my list. Purses are purged, coats are donated, shoes are gone thru... I feel like I've accomplished something. Not to mention that purging is just a good thing to do now.

The bathrooms have also been scrubbed. Though they still need the mirrors and floors done. And purging. But everything in time, right?

I think I have some items I should list on craigslist. Or perhaps I should have a garage sale. I hate garage sales. People always come around talking in "bits." Listen... the currency we use here is DOLLARS. I'm not working a conversion table. Oy. Anyway, that's a moot complaint as I'm really just not going to have a garage sale.

The schedule
I've started a schedule. It's barely more than a "straw-man," but it's something. Once I get some of this purging done and school starts, I can really hone in on assigning tasks to specific days and on what the day is going to look like. I bought some preschool materials for the 3 yo. I'll be sure to work that into the schedule.

The paperwork
I still haven't touched any unemployment paperwork. It's partly a function of the interruption-driven lifestyle of a home with small children. But it's mostly a function of ... gosh, it's just hard to acknowledge that my services are no longer needed by my former employer. At any rate, I'm not sure if some of my frustration and, let's be honest here, anger are justified, or if it's just part of the grieving process. Probably some of each. The hard part is accepting that there were some fantastic elements of the job. And some foul elements. And that most of the elements are people. Anyway, enough web whining.

I guess it's time to face the post midnight music and get some shut eye. Perhaps it's the dreaded wheel-o-thoughts that's keeping me away from bed.

Yay, it's FRIDAY! ...not that it really matters...

So it's Friday. I used to look forward to fridays. Now it's just another day. It's been a rougher day. I have a cold, and the boys are settling back into the old routine after being at Grandma and Grandpa's (x2) and various and sundry other fun locations. I am much less interesting.

We have a park going into our neighborhood. It was (re(re(re)))scheduled to be completed this weekend. Alas. That would have been nice. They could have screamed to their hearts content and I could have mocked up the coma I was hoping for.

Now the sssh-ed-ju-wull has not been completed yet. Okay, it hasn't been started yet. I need to get out our calendar and start filling in menu plans and other daily activities. A prototype model, if you will.

Friday's Itinerary
Because I believe in measurement, and that you can only improve what you measure, here's a snapshot of today's activities:

8:30 roll out of bed (unemployment has it's perks)
9:00 make malt-o-meal for breakfast
9:10 clean up spilled malt-o-meal
9:30 dishes, get boys dressed
9:32 send fighting boys outside to run laps
9:36 send fighting boys outside to run laps again
9:39 give up, lock the back doors, take a shower
10:00, see how the boys behave!
10:05 more laps
10:15 consent to allow the 3 yo to open a box containing a laptop tray thing.
10:20 vacuum up all the bits of broken styrofoam beads on the carpet. Not ready for winter yet.
10:30 7yo watches Indiana Jones whilst the 3yo watches Dora
10:31 Mommy gets to catch up on emails... though really... not much going on in THAT department these days. NOT that I'm complaining.
11:00 unpack


Okay, I confess, I can't remember exactly how it all went down until noontime when we had smoothies for lunch. But what a healthy lunch it was!

1:00 First attempt at naptime -- Sadly, we are growing out of these. It's more like an every other day sort of event. Since we haven't had one in the last couple days, it was very needed. Alas, it was not to be.

3:00 I'm exhausted. Side effect of the cold. Nose needs a faucet to turn it off, and I'm just tired. I let the boys turn on Indiana Jones again, hoping they'd watch it quietly while I laid down. Yeah, didn't work

Cut to the chase--It's not really interesting
Okay, suffice it to say, I don't have a schedule. I need to figure out a couple periods during the day when I can play a bit on the computer or read, and otherwise, I need some little activities for the busy fingers around here.

I miss outlook. I need to just order the new computer and start using the time management tool I'm used to. We are odd creatures, aren't we? Is it me clinging to my worky lifestyle, or is it me really just used to one way of doing things? I'm not feeling like I'm accomplishing much.

Yoga
No, it is not available on Dish on Demand. In case you were interested. So I need to buy a DVD or something. I'll tell you, though, it won't be as fun as the CLASS. With the instructor. And my girlfriends. But it will be good. I'll do it with my boys instead.

"The Whys"
I'll be honest. I'm struggling with a case of the WHYs. Why me. Why not someone else. How long was my name on the list? Who REALLY was the one who decided my skills were less necessary than someone else's? Intellectually, I know it's absurd. Knowing wouldn't bring me any peace; quite the opposite, I'm sure. I'd really like to pass through this part.

Vitamin D-Day
Friday is vitamin D-day. Huh?? Yeah, I know. I guess I'm severely deficient in the Vitamin D. I had no idea this was possible. My arms are tan. My face is... tannish. (I call my legs "snow cammo," so no sun there). I buy the vitamin D enriched stuff. But yeah. I have to take 50,000 IUs per week. No typo there. Get your Vitamin D checked! I guess here in the Northwest, it's pretty common. The UVB is what synthesizes the vitamin D, and that's what all the sunscreens block out (as it also causes the burn... UVA is what tans), and it's only available during a narrow window of time, even in the summer up here. Evidently, the angle of the sun is an important factor. Next time you have to have blood drawn for some reason, ask for a vitamin D test! It's simple, and there's no need to study. Google it. :D

The boxes
I have a few boxes of desk stuff in the garage. I have no idea what to do with them. Not ready to unpack them yet. Though I'll have to get to them eventually.

Next week
On the agenda: start all the "stuff." COBRA, education benefits??, education options, blah blah blah, phone calls and seminars and paperwork.